Influencer Jeff Nippard is opening up about his mental health struggles after the death of his fiancée, Stephanie Buttermore.
“I’ve been staying in my friend’s basement for the past few weeks and he has a barbell and a dumbbell down there, so I’ve been getting back to my roots with some basic strength training again. A part of me likes having a minimal set up like this because the constraints force me to get creative,” Nippard wrote via Instagram on Sunday, May 24, alongside videos of him exercising. “Working out during grief has been one of those things that I really don’t want to do but I’m glad I did once it’s done.”
He continued, “My depression has been bad, so my strength is down a lot and for the first time I can remember, I have no real desire to workout. That said, I do find that if I just say to myself, ‘Go in and lift the empty bar up and down 10 times, that’s better than nothing’ … at least I get moving. After that, if I still want to stop, I will. If it feels fine, I’ll keep going. I usually end up finishing the workout anyway because it usually does feel better once it’s started.”
Nippard shared that he’s also “taken some time away from social media and YouTube.”
“It’s a break that I felt I needed, so thank you for understanding,” he wrote. “I really appreciate all the support during this time and I hope you guys are doing well 🙏🏻.”
News broke in March that Buttermore died.
“It is with profound sorrow that we share the sudden passing of Jeff’s fiancée and partner of 10 years, Stephanie,” an Instagram statement from Nippard’s team read at the time. “As many of you know, Stephanie meant the world to Jeff.”
The statement continued, “She will be remembered for her warmth and compassion, her love for her family and her Ph.D research on ovarian cancer. We kindly ask for privacy as we navigate this tragic loss. Thank you for your understanding and support during this difficult time.”
One month later, Nippard broke his silence on Buttermore’s death by sharing that he had spent time with his late fiancée’s “family and closest friends to celebrate her life and share memories with each other.”
“When I think about Stephanie, I keep coming back to how loving and kind she was. She really made the world a better place,” he wrote via Instagram in April. “I’m not sure if many of you know this, but during her PhD, she studied a protein called RHAMM, and found out that it could help detect ovarian cancer early. There’s a copy of her PhD dissertation in my bio if you’d like to read it. It’s one of the first things that made me fall in love with her.”
He continued, “On her YouTube channel, she helped people feel less alone, especially when it comes to struggling with food and body image. Her journey helped so many people be more accepting of themselves, and I love her so much for doing that. She always put her family first and she had an especially loving bond with her mom. We built this backyard garden in her honour (purple was her favourite colour) and it means so, so much to me.”
Nippard shared that he had read “many” messages in the past weeks, noting that the “support has helped us all.”
“Stephanie’s mom loves hearing stories about the difference her daughter made. We talk almost every day and it’s been incredibly difficult but we’re making it together,” he concluded. “If you were a fan of Stephanie, then I’m a fan of you. I hope she made your life better in some way. She made my life amazing and I’m so grateful for the time we had ❤️.”
